RELAX! It’s Not That Serious…

RELAXI always wonder if many people think like I do. Then I think about that statement and even I laugh out loud! I’m certainly an oddball and the thoughts that run through my head should probably never see the light of day, but they often do. Imagine the ones that don’t.  I think it’s why I finally gravitated towards a writing career. Writer’s minds are loaded with oddball thoughts. It’s what makes for great fiction more-so than life. But if it’s a thought in my head, no matter how odd, that thought constitutes as part of life. After all…Where would we be without our brains? What did I tell you? Oddball. It’s in my nature and the less I fight it the better off everyone is––including myself. Relax! It’s not that serious!

At least that’s what I’ve been trying to tell myself and then I had an epiphany.

We spend more time worrying about things that are so totally unimportant it begs the question as to why? Why do we spend so much time worrying or fussing about things that don’t really matter?

It’s the little things…

The answer to that question is too large because everyone (contrary to popular beliefs) is an individual. What makes up (INSERT NAME HERE) can never be the same as what makes up (INSERT DIFFERENT NAME HERE). It’s an impossibility…even for twins. Fraternal or not. Our life circumstances create unique individuals out of all of us. Even if two people were raised entirely the same…same food, same teachings, same routines, same environment…they would still be different because their internal perceptions could never be manipulated and tweaked to produce the same thoughts. And that is why the answer to why we spend so much time worrying about unimportant things varies from person to person.

Accountability is the one true factor or tool, that is unescapable when it comes to measuring. I know that may seem like a random thought when discussing our behaviors, but trust me. I’m going to show you how to use it, not only for this instance but for just about every instance you question your thoughts or behavior.

By accountability, as a tool in this case, I’m talking about writing it down. We may think that we can hold everything in our heads and mind you, some of us are very good. Especially writers. We need to remember everything that happened in our novels before we can firmly plant those next steps. If we didn’t, every character would be wearing something different in each scene or speaking the same dialogue in every other.

But just because some of us can do it, doesn’t mean that it’s always perfect. Ever drive from the grocery store and suddenly remember you forgot the eggs?

Write it down!

If you think you’re spending too much time worrying about stuff that doesn’t matter, try keeping a journal of each of those instances. Give it a week or two, then evaluate or do an analysis on those entries. (That’s the accountant in me.)

When we force ourselves to look at the big picture, we can discover things we never really knew. Go over that list of worries after two weeks & you’ll be surprised at how insignificant all that worrying was. The sun will always rise (at least in our lifetimes) and there will always be another tomorrow.

All that wasted time worrying, whether you realize or believe it, takes a toll on our minds and bodies. And I don’t know about you, but mine has had enough…Thank-you-very-much! Which is why I try to limit whatever stress I can.

Now, this may seem silly to you, so, let’s apply it to another life circumstance: Breakfast.

Just about every day, I hop into Herbie (my Mini Cooper) and traverse the 30-second ride over to Dunkin Donuts. I love their Sausage, Egg & Cheese Wake-up Wraps, and their Hash-browns…oh, how I love those Hash-browns! Oh, yeah, and a large hot Dark Roast. I’m a coffee snob and they brew a fresh pot…just for me, every time. No, I didn’t complain. I know how I’m a coffee snob (oddball) but I truly only like it freshly brewed. All I say as I pull up to the drive-thru (in a friendly voice) is, “Good Morning! Is the dark roast fresh today?” They sell it all day. It should be fresh. And they’re good (at least with me) as far as customer service is concerned. I’m getting way off topic, but I know some of you would want to know, so…back on topic!

The cost of my breakfast is $7.51. Is it a little pricey? Depends on who you ask, but that isn’t the point. Currently, a carton of 18 eggs at Shoprite is $1.82. Or at least it was when I bought my carton. I have no clue why so cheap, but let’s go with it. And let’s say it isn’t too pricey for a good breakfast that I really enjoy.

If I just look at it, day-by-day, then I’d be of the thinking that it isn’t so expensive. Plus, it’s a time saver and let’s face it: Who wants to cook? But if you look at the big picture since you’ve been writing it down every day (the smart one’s just highlight their bank statements) you’re spending $2,741.15 a year on breakfast!

It really does seem pricey…now. Now that you’ve taken a look at the big picture, which is what this article should really have been titled. But it started out with RELAX! It’s Not That Serious! and I’m stubborn & didn’t want to change it, so I made it work or at least I think I did. You tell me…in the comments, whether you think it did or not. Your opinion is yours and I’d never dare even THINK about trying to take it away from you.

Now apply this Accountability Tool to just about anything & try and find where it would not help in any situation. Think about it. When is it ever a bad time to take a look at the big picture? I cannot tell you how many times this tool has helped me to “See the Light.” I think it’s from my accounting background. Accountants are always analyzing things or at least the good ones do.

So, the next time you find yourself in a situation, Relax! It’s Not That Serious and remember my Accountability Tool. Measure those circumstances and see if you’re surprised by the results. It may be a good thing or it may be a bad thing, but you’ll never know unless you take accurate steps to measure it! Below…I’ve added a little bonus: 5 WAYS TO RELAX IN 60 SECONDS OR LESS




  1. Mickie Lear · · Reply

    Great advice, Dean! Also, that breakfast wrap sounds delicious. I’m gonna have to go get me one. Lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve been eating them for forever! They’re delish!


  2. Ozzy Motley ;) · · Reply

    Awesome post, as always! And it made me laugh because I keep notes, lists etc. too — Otherwise, I would leave the store without eggs etc. every time – LOL

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The scary part is that I never needed lists….before. 😦


  3. Always love your stories. Keep em comin. ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. 😘😘😘


  4. Loved it. Just wanted to tell that 18 count eggs are over 3$ at Publix! Your getting off cheap!!!! Enjoy a Dunk’n Donuts breakfast for me (type 2 diabetes has limited me to something like that only for a special occasion).

    Liked by 1 person

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